Rain, rain go away.

Last week it rained like nobody's business. It would rain one day and I would take the entire next day to dry out. Just as I began to feel warm the skies opened up again and I would be drenched faster than you can say _________. It was nice at first, but walking through swamps for a whole week can get tiring. When driving the only thing I wanted to do was put my head back and watch the grey sky tumble over itself. Even a neon blue car that passed me by didn't look so neon. Everything had a sort of delicate layer of grey over it, and it felt like the beginning of spring, finally.

Yesterday was a hot, summery day. I opened my window for the first time this year and the attic fan ran for half the night. That's what really made it feel like summer. I was sticky even after showering and lay in bed on top of my covers, just listening to the lull of the attic fan suck in new born spring air and tiny bugs.

I am always sleepy nowadays. Addicted to coffee and still sleepy. I wonder what it feels like to be ___________.

Creepy Stalker Song? Yes please!

Creepy song is creepily cool. All that aside, I've been struggling with some inner things lately. I've been trying to figure out a way to get out of here and get to China somehow, but all ideas so far require me to at least wait a year or so. :/ And so here I am, stuck as ever and slightly bitter. My writing has been on major pause since last summer. I am getting no where and I'm afraid I won't be able to write much this summer either. For the most part I'm happy right now, it's just one of those lulls in life where nothing much is exciting, but nothing much is bad either. So yeah, that's all for now.

/SOBS omg what is life what is air I know not

CLICK THE PICTURE FOR LIFESIZE PERFECTION

In my dream, you were smiling

I want the facial-haired dancer's jacket. Also, it'd be nice if he came with it.

First day of new semester

And I'm already freaking out. About microbio that is. OMG SO HARD. I think I'm going to die. Really. But I hope not. Since I will begin studying tomorrow. YES I WILL PASS THIS SCIENCE CLASS WITH AN A. IF IT IS THE LAST THING I DO.

Inshallah.

On another note, I'm taking Comm, Poli Sci and Chinese. :) Excited mostly about Chinese.

Watching...

My Name is Khan is making me think about some things. The movie is kind of long and tedious but still very powerful. I know I am a Muslim, and I also know I am NOT a terrorist, like most of the world seems to think.

The hardest thing I think explaining to people is why I am Muslim.

People ask me questions all the time, honest questions, stupid ones, ignorant ones and even insulting ones. But this is the hardest for me to answer. I try to avoid it because I usually make a fool of myself. How do you explain something like that in words? HOW? I haven't been able to so far, but let me try once more, in writing.


I am Muslim because I am in love. In love with the truth of the religion, the truth that has set me free as a woman and a human being. I am in love with Muhammad (saw) who worried for me even when he did not know me. How could someone who doesn't know me love me? Before I even exist? That fact alone pulls me towards him and my heart yearns for him like a dying man in a desert yearns for water. He is what pulls me towards the truth, and offers it to me, without any strings attached. And it makes sense. The truth is so powerful, so alluring, how can I not fall for it? The truth is that all humans are born innocent, the killing of one innocent person is equal to the death of all humanity, men and women are equal, yet different. The truth is that nothing that is not meant to be will never happen, and anything that does happen to you, would never have missed you. The truth is that I am a powerful individual, with the ability to change the world, to cure hunger and cancer and hate. Allah (swt) has given me this truth and if I were to step away from it, ignore it, or not understand it, I would die a fool.

I am so in love that it is ingrained into every cell of my body. My heart responds to the light and freedom of Islam. It bangs against my ribcage, begging for more. I have tasted and loved it, how could I ever be satisfied with anything else? It's a drug for me. The drug gives me inner peace and bliss like I have never found elsewhere. The drug is peace. Peace is Islam. Islam is my truth. Truth is the drug.

So the reason why I am a Muslim is because I am in love. My love is so great that I am drowned in it, and there is no way out for me. But I'm not really looking for one.

If you have any questions about my faith, then please feel free to ask. I'm always open for friendly discussion and debate. :)

SO ridiculously happy right now

Alright, so I failed my first college Bio course... which is ridiculous and doubly shameful since it's my thing... y'know? Anywho I was expecting a C in that class, so I calculated out that if I got all As in my other three classes, I'd make the scholarship GPA requirement. But then... disaster struck when I got an A- in Honors. UGH I will forever hate Honors. So basically at this point in time I was sweating bullets, and was like oh no, if I get that C in Bio I'll be lower than my GPA requirement. :(

But then, miraculously, I got a B in Bio!!

So I made it!! (yes, by a hair, but still, I made it.)